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Thread: Hollywood Babble #5 with Hayden Panettiere

  1. #1
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    fanfiction Hollywood Babble #5 with Hayden Panettiere

    CELEBFANFORUM PRESENTS...
    HOLLYWOOD BABBLE #5

    FEATURING Hayden Panettiere
    Created by TPG
    DISCLAIMER: This fictional interview was written for entertainment purposes only
    A/N: Knowing this girls history, I knew it wasn't going to be hard to have some fun.


    "Lopez Tonight"
    LOS ANGELES, February 17, 2011



    GEORGE LOPEZ:
    You know my first guest from such shows as "Heroes" and "Nashville," and on Monday night she will be staring in a lifetime movie based on The Amanda Knox story. Please give it up for the beautiful, Hayden Panettiere.


    BAND PLAYS TO THE SOUND OF APPLAUSE





    LOPEZ:
    I think I got your name right. They had to write it down for me and everything. I had to do it over and over again. But I think I got it.

    PANETTIERE:
    Oh man. Yeah it's a tough one. Thanks.

    LOPEZ:
    Panettiere. Pan-etti-ere.

    PANETTIERE:
    You know, they pronounce it better over in Italy. I went over there and heard them pronounce it properly and I was like, "So that's how you pronounce it."


    AUDIENCE LAUGHS


    LOPEZ:
    Oh really? So how Italian are you. Do you eat pasta for breakfast?

    PANETTIERE:
    Yeah. Absolutely. But I don't think you have to be Italian to do that.

    LOPEZ:
    Do you like drinking wine with dinner, and getting hammered?

    PANETTIERE:
    Hell yeah. (nods head)What's up!


    HAYDEN GIVES GEORGE A HIGH-FIVE


    LOPEZ:
    You ever wake up with a total stranger in your bed from the night before?





    PANETTIERE:
    Yeah dude. Are you kidding. Who hasn't.


    GEORGE GIVES HAYDEN A HIGH-FIVE


    LOPEZ:
    So do you speak any Italian?

    PANETTIERE:
    Um. I do know a few words. But I'm a bad Italian. I probably speak more "Spang-lish" than I do my own language.

    LOPEZ:
    Really. Can you say something?


    AUDIENCE CHEERS


    PANETTIERE:
    Sure. Me gusta cojer hombers mayores [I like to fuck older men].

    LOPEZ:
    Así que usted entiende espaņoles [So you understand Spanish].


    AUDIENCE WOOF WHISTLES


    PANETTIERE:
    Ah, Da. I mean, Si. I mean, Yes.


    AUDIENCE LAUGHS


    PANETTIERE:
    Sorry. I have a Russian boyfriend right now. So it always comes out.





    LOPEZ:
    What's your favorite thing to say in Spanish?


    HAYDEN GRINS


    PANETTIERE:
    Err. I don't know if I should say.

    LOPEZ:
    No go ahead. If it's bad they'll just bleep it out. Trust me.

    PANETTIERE:
    Okay. Me gusta el en culo. [I like it in the ass].


    GEORGE CHUCKLES


    LOPEZ:
    Really. You do?


    HAYDEN GIGGLES


    LOPEZ:
    What about, "Puta." Do you like that word?

    PANETTIERE:
    Mm. I love that word. That's another favorite of mine.

    LOPEZ:
    So you mentioned your boyfriend earlier. How exactly did you two hook up?





    PANETTIERE:
    We just hooked up through friends one night.

    LOPEZ:
    At a party of something?

    PANETTIERE:
    Something like that. I was in Vegas for the weekend with some girlfriends and to make a long story short, ended up at some private party which was pretty wild. By the end of the weekend, I had a new boyfriend.

    LOPEZ:
    So for those who don't know, why don't you tell everyone who he is.

    PANETTIERE:
    He's Wladimir Klitschko.

    LOPEZ:
    Wladimir Klitschko, the World Champion boxer.

    PANETTIERE:
    Yep, I know. He's big.

    LOPEZ:
    That's your boyfriend? You seen him naked and everything.


    AUDIENCE CHUCKLES


    PANETTIERE:
    Yep. Everything. He's really big.

    LOPEZ:
    You like them big?

    PANETTIERE:
    Absolutely. The bigger the better.





    LOPEZ:
    Are you a size queen or something?


    HAYDEN SMILES


    PANETTIERE:
    Wouldn't be the first time I've heard that. I guess I'm picky.

    LOPEZ:
    How picky.

    PANETTIERE:
    Well. I definitely have a type.


    GEORGE INTERRUPTS HER MID-SENTENCE


    LOPEZ:
    Like, what's an average size penis to you? Would you say seven inches is average, or small?

    PANETTIERE:
    What? (giggles) Ha. That's tiny.


    AUDIENCE LAUGHS


    LOPEZ:
    Really.

    PANETTIERE:
    Meh. I could take seven-inches back in my teen years.

    LOPEZ:
    You could? Wow.





    PANETTIERE:
    I know I might look tiny, but trust me.

    LOPEZ:
    I was just about to say that. Aren't you like 5'1.

    PANETTIERE:
    Yes but, believe me. I can suck cock with the best of them.

    LOPEZ:
    Oh. I believe you. From the stuff I've heard you definitely get around. How tall is your boyfriend again?

    PANETTIERE:
    Wlad is like 6'5. And for the record he's got a beautiful cock.


    AUDIENCE GASPS


    LOPEZ:
    So I guess the Sixty-Four-Million Dollar question is.


    HAYDEN INTERRUPTS GEORGE MID-SENTENCE


    PANETTIERE:
    I know. I know. (giggles) I know what you're going to ask me.

    LOPEZ:
    What?

    PANETTIERE:
    You're going to ask me how we have sex.


    GEORGE LOOKS AT THE AUDIENCE


    LOPEZ:
    Am I really that obvious?





    PANETTIERE:
    No. It's just everyone seems to ask me that.

    LOPEZ:
    Well. How do you guys do it. I mean, standing beside each other he looks like he could crush you. Unless, you always get on top?

    PANETTIERE:
    Well. Like I said I'm only a tiny girl. So there are only a few positions that are comfortable for me.

    LOPEZ:
    And you're boyfriend is huge. How does your body handle that. I'm impressed.

    PANETTIERE:
    Trust me. It works out fine. Especially since I like it a little rough anyways.


    GEORGE SEEMS SURPRISED


    LOPEZ:
    You like rough sex?

    PANETTIERE:
    Well like most girls I like to be spanked, ya'know.

    LOPEZ:
    Really. Where on your butt?

    PANETTIERE:
    Absolutely. Especially when I've been a bad girl.


    AUDIENCE WHISTLES


    LOPEZ:
    What about dirty talk. Do you like that too?





    PANETTIERE:
    What about it. (giggles) I fucking love it! I'm a big believer in dirty talk in the bedroom. In fact I guess you could say I'm a little on the loud side. I scream a lot.

    LOPEZ:
    Oh really. So what do you like to say?

    PANETTIERE:
    You know, the usual stuff. Like... "Take That Ass," or "Fuck This Tight Little Pussy," Or "Choke Me Harder." You know the fun stuff. I find the dirtier and louder I am, the harder Wladimir likes to pound me. And I really like getting pounded hard. That shit really gets me off.

    LOPEZ:
    So you like getting choked too?

    PANETTIERE:
    God yes. That's the best part. Especially when you're about to cum. There's just nothing like getting the shit fucked out of you, and being suffocated at the same time. It's so hot.

    LOPEZ:
    Man. You white girls are fucking crazy.


    AUDIENCE LAUGHS


    PANETTIERE:
    Hey. Have you ever been with a white girl before?

    LOPEZ:
    Not really. Not unless you count those two hookers in Tijuana a few years ago.

    PANETTIERE:
    White girls in Tijuana, really?

    LOPEZ:
    Actually, I think they were mostly Asian. Oh. And there was that girl who played my daughter on my show.

    PANETTIERE:
    Which show. This show?





    LOPEZ:
    No. Stupid. (playfully snipes) My other show, The George Lopez Show.

    PANETTIERE:
    You mean the girl who played Carmen Lopez?


    GEORGE GRINS SMUGLY


    LOPEZ:
    So you've heard of Masiela Lusha before?

    PANETTIERE:
    Yeah. I've seen her around. She's cute. So you fucked the girl who played your daughter on your own TV show? Wow. That's pretty crazy.

    LOPEZ:
    Obviously she's not my real daughter. But yeah. I did. I waxed that ass.


    AUDIENCE CHEERS


    PANETTIERE:
    But isn't she a Latina?

    LOPEZ:
    No. Not at all. She's actually European. Or at least, that's what she told me at the time.


    HAYDEN LAUGHS


    LOPEZ:
    Then again, half the time I couldn't really understand a word she was saying. Since she had her lips around my cock, y'know.

    PANETTIERE:
    Oh man. You're so bad. (grinning) I thought I was bad sleeping with just about everyone on my show.





    LOPEZ:
    Hey. Those are the advantages of having your own sitcom. You call the shots.

    PANETTIERE:
    Remind me to get my own show in the near future.

    LOPEZ:
    Trust me. You you'd like it. It's a total power trip.

    PANETTIERE:
    Yeah. I bet. I mean I used to have a lot of fun on the "Heroes" set. I'd tease all the guys and then invite then into my trailer one after the other and make them whack off to me. It was really fun, but it'd be even more interesting if I was in charge. Then I'd probably take advantage of the female cast as well and make them eat my pussy or something.

    LOPEZ:
    Yeah. Definitely. So back to this "choking" stuff. You really like it, eh.

    PANETTIERE:
    What. Haven't you ever had an orgasm while being asphyxiated?


    GEORGE LOOKS FRIGHTENED


    LOPEZ:
    Hell no. Like I said, you white girls are fucking loco.

    PANETTIERE:
    Yeah. We definitely like to have fun in the bedroom. No limits.

    LOPEZ:
    But let me ask you this. How did you get so experienced in bed. Especially since you look so sweet and innocent.

    PANETTIERE:
    You know what they say, never judge a book by its cover. I know I might look cute, but in reality I just love getting FUCKED. And the more dirtier and nastier it is, the more I like it. You don't want to even know some of the stuff I've seen and done over the years.





    LOPEZ:
    So would you say you've been with a lot of guys?

    PANETTIERE:
    Um. Not really. I mean, probably the same amount as any other girl my age in Hollywood. But yes, I have dated all kinds of guys. From young boys to older men. Some who are even older than my dad.

    LOPEZ:
    Ah. So you've got "Daddy Issues" huh?

    PANETTIERE:
    Yeah. I guess (shrugs) But don't we all? I mean I don't know one single girl in the industry who doesn't like playing out that fantasy in her head. One time, me and another actress pretended to be sisters while we fucked this rich dude in Cannes. It was pretty perverted stuff even for me, but his yacht was to die for.

    LOPEZ:
    So you like men who are much older than you.

    PANETTIERE:
    Yes. Absolutely. They definitely have more experience and money, and I prefer them to be married. I just love Sugar Daddies. How do you think a girl like me could afford to buy a brand new Porsche Cayenne. That was a gift from a "friend" and trust me when I tell you, I earned every penny...I also couldn't walk for a week, but it was so worth it.

    LOPEZ:
    I bet you did. Let's say I wasn't married. Would you "date" me?

    PANETTIERE:
    Depends. (giggles) How much money do you have...and how big is your cock?"


    GEORGE LOOKS AT THE CAMERA


    LOPEZ:
    See. I knew it. You really are a size queen, Hayden.





    HAYDEN CAN'T STOP LAUGHING


    PANETTIERE:
    Well go on. Take it out then. I dare you.

    LOPEZ:
    What. Are you fucking high right now or what?

    PANETTIERE:
    I'll make you a deal. If you take it out right now, I'll drop to my knees and suck your dick on live TV.


    AUDIENCE CHEERS LOUDLY


    LOPEZ:
    Hold on. Hold on. (blushing) Didn't I mention I'm married.

    PANETTIERE:
    Didn't I mention I have a boyfriend. But you don't hear me whining like a little bitch. C'mon. Take it out. Let me suck that big fat cock of yours.


    AUDIENCE APPLAUDS


    LOPEZ:
    Coņo. You really do like to talk dirty don't you.

    PANETTIERE:
    You have no idea.

    LOPEZ:
    On that note. Please help me thank my guest Hayden Panettiere, and make sure to watch her latest project which premiere's on Monday night at 9pm. We'll be right back after the break.


    FADE TO COMMERCIAL






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  3. #2
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    Goddamn, another TPG classic ...

  4. Thanks TPG thanked for this post
  5. #3
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    Thanks Chitown, glad you liked it. These things are way fun to create.

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